Matthew's first official words...

Words that Matthew can say in context as of today:

"mama" for food

"up...down" and he actually lifts his head up or puts it down as he says it

"deeeee" for please

"moo" for water (mool)

"bah bah" for bubble

"gguh" for 'this' (ee-guh)

"daw" for more

he can also sign hello, more, sorry, byebye, and he can blow a kiss...sounds like "uhm-MAH' haha..

My boy is growing up!!!!

Sept-Oct. update..I really have to get better at updating..

What a couple of months it has been!

The absolute best part of the past couple of months was that Matthew turned 1!!! Happy birthday to my not-so-little-but-still-my-baby boy!! We had a wonderful time celebrating w/Huey's family and my sister that night. Matthew was in such a great mood that night and though the party was for him, I think he brought more joy to my inlaws. He's still not walking yet, but he's great at cruising. He points at everything, says "gguh" for "eeguh" (this one), does "sahlangheh yo" with his arms (but rather than making a heart above his head, he just taps his head), waves goodbye like it's no ones business, says "uh-uh" for uh-oh and he's eating just about everything now like miyukgook, galbi jjim, grilled cheese, etc. he's growing up!! :) here are a few pics..more to come!

visit to Virginia and beyond...

We went to visit grandma and grandpa in Virginia from July 20th-August 12th--the shortest & longest three weeks of the summer for me. The brevity of those three weeks is due to Matthew's great developmental accomplishments. He went from squirming like a worm on the floor to crawling on hands and knees in a short 5 days! I'm sure all that squirming and maneuvering on his belly all attributed to his increased ability to get himself from point A to point B, but it literally took about 5 days to get to the next level for him, and boy it was amazing! I couldn't be prouder to see my boy crawl. Not only that, but his personality is shining through even more. When he gets happy or excited he expresses it by laughing while clapping and turning around in sitting position. He looks as though he's on a mini merry-go-round; it's the cutest sight ever. On top of that, he's learned that "up, down" means put your head up then down. By the end of our trip, this was translated into "ahn nyung hah seh yo" in which he just drops his head down. If he likes you he'll keep nodding his head up and down, making you say "ahn nyung hah seh yo" over and over again. Sometimes I wonder who's playing with who here. hehe.. When his daddy got back from Canada, he taught M the word "bahksoo." Not that he could say it, but he definitely understands and responds by clapping his hands. I have such a smart boy!

As awesome as it was to witness all these little milestones, the three weeks were TOO long to be without my husband. He was off in Canada with a group of kids from our church doing missions work in Gitanyow--a Native American village. How I wanted to be there!!! But, I knew that my role was to stay home, take care of M and pray, so I did and God was more than my comforter. Many times I felt like my heart physically ache because of his absence, but I prayed into it, asking God specifically to be my comforter and He was. Thank You Jesus! Sometimes I wish I could just be somewhere like Gitanyow, or Newark airport on the morning of Huey's arrival, but as a mom I have to put M first, which in all honesty is really hard for me sometimes. I love him and would give up my life for him, but sometimes I just want to do something for me, you know? And I can't. Being a mom is no easy role; it's all about being selfless--about putting my family's well being before my own. It's hard, and sometimes I feel like I'm at the edge of tipping over when taking care of my family and home. This compels me all the more to pray because I know I just can't do it on my own....

I pray and ask God for much needed grace, wisdom, patience, a good sense of humor and passionate love because I know my family needs me to embody these things.

I pray and desperately ask God to help me because I love my family.

Those three weeks away from Huey were probably the hardest weeks, along with all the other weeks he's been away. This time around though, it wasn't AS bad as the other times b/c of one thing: I embraced my role as a mom and a wife--I stayed home, took good care of M and prayed for my husband. It's much easier to live life to the fullest when you actually start to embrace your role, your circumstance and situation that's in front of you.

A few more updates:

- M now points to things that he wants and pushes away things that he doesn't want (i.e. the milk i'm trying to feed him for HIS OWN GOOD! sigh..)

-M will not stay still while having his diaper changed. This poses a HUGE and MESSY problem when he's pooped. And let me tell you, his poop is no ordinary little poop that you would think would come out of a little baby. OOOHHHH NOOOOO!

- M loves it to be quiet and will yell at anyone who is making too much noise (i.e. he yelled at everyone during the mini-olympics at the retreat. another i.e. he yelled at zoie for screaming. )

-M loves to play peek-a-boo. He always has, but really cracks up each time...love it!!

-M LOVES cell phones, cable boxes, laptops/computers, and remote controls.

-M LOVES books and is quite skilled at flipping pages.

2 Years and Counting :D :D :D

For all those years I talked about, cried over and wondered if I would ever find a man--a good quality, God-fearing man--I am so very glad that I could sit here today and say that I am married to Huey, the man that I dreamt of and desired. I remember the first time I knew I was going to marry Huey...it was right before our 1st date. I know, seems kind of like...I can't think of the word..like Woah! Slow down Alice! (My vocabulary has decreased tremendously since my pregnancy.) But I remember that exact moment. It happened at morning prayer meeting. I read Mark 10..

4They said, "Moses permitted a man to write a certificate of divorce and send her away." 5"It was because your hearts were hard that Moses wrote you this law," Jesus replied. 6"But at the beginning of creation God 'made them male and female.'[a] 7'For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife,[b] 8and the two will become one flesh.'[c] So they are no longer two, but one. 9Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate."

At first I thought why is God telling me about divorce??? And I'll get to that later. After reading the rest of the verses though, I knew from then on that I was going to marry Huey. This is what God intended when he created marriage. This is what He intended for me and Huey. Never did I feel such conviction and certainty. I was SO overwhelmed. SO excited. I had grown up watching my parents love each other, grow together, and be each other's best friend, and I was SO ready to start that phase of my life with Huey.

At the start of this section of Mark 10, Jesus addresses divorce and states that the only reason why it exists is because "your hearts were hard." I've only been married for a short 2 years, but I could see how if you hold a grudge here, make an assumption there, and never really communicate and open up to change, then one's heart could become hard to the point of no return. But, this is one of the greatest things about loving Jesus and marrying a man who loves Jesus. No matter what happens--no matter what kind of misunderstanding we go through, or what type of hardships we face in our relationship--I know that there will be an end to it, and that the outcome will only bring about a deeper closeness between the two of us. I know this b/c Huey and I are both committed to God b/c we know we can't live w/o Him. That translates into our commitment to one another. There is no leaving or looking outside of our relationship for answers. It's within our hearts. Divorce happens b/c one's heart gets hard, so to avoid all that ugliness, I've learned that when things get yucky I have to first look w/in my heart and ask myself honestly if there's something that needs to be dealt with. Before I point fingers or lose control of my emotions and thoughts, I have to be introspective and honest with myself. I have to make sure that my heart isn't hard, but rather it's sensitive, full of love and grace. I have to make sure that sin (ex. my insecurities) is not dictating how I respond in a certain situation, but that my heart is pure and again, full of love.

This is not something that's easy nor is it pretty. It's hard searching in my heart b/c I tend to find out things that are SO ugly and that I just do not want to even start dealing with. But, as hard as it is , I have to say that it's much harder being upset b/c my husband and I aren't communicating well. And in all honesty, all this soul-searching, repenting and forgiving has brought me SOO much deeper in my relationship with God and with Huey. It's actually been one of the best things about being married.

So, with that said I just want to say that I am so thankful for my husband. In the past two years, he has shown me what commitment is all about. He's been persistent, gentle, so kind and loving, always willing to be better for me, helping me to be better with God, accepting all of me (my extra 30 lbs and some! haha) and always praying for me. I couldn't ask for more. I pray that I may always be a wife that's deserving of such a husband. God help me to love him the way you do!

So, cheers to 2 years babe! I wish we could celebrate it together today, but it's just one day out of the many more days that we'll be spending celebrating our life together. I love you!

M.'s latest moves: crawling, spinning and sitting up from crawl position

In the past week or so Matthew has really been perfecting the art of crawling, both on his belly and his knees...and I couldn't be any more prouder. Not proud b/c I did anything, because I haven't taught him anything about leg placement or pushing off with your feet or alternating your arms, but just proud because he's doing this all on his own. I can't push him or coach him to do this right...all I can do is give him the space to try it out and cheer him on. Amazing how little control I really do have, and yet all is working out SO very well. Thank you God for letting my son grow healthy and strong.
As for the spinning, do all babies do this? haha...I think it's the funniest thing. He'll just sit on his tush and go around in circles. Sometimes as he spins he'll look back at me and flash a huge dimpled smile. You know I just MELT when he does that.
And as for the sitting...well, I don't know how but he literally mastered that in 4-5 days. Sometimes it's still hard for him to go back into crawling position though, but it's all a work in progress.
You go Matthew!!! I'm so proud of you!!

swimming!

So we took Matthew to the pool for the first time this past Monday, and he LOVED it! I thought he'd be scared (b/c he was scared the first time I put him into the bathtub), and he did start off a bit cautious, but 5 minutes in and he was already kicking his legs. I think he's gonna learn to swim before learning to walk! So Huey took him the first two times but now that he's not here (off to Canada for a missions trip) I have to take him to the pool...which means only one thing for me....I have to buy and wear a bathing suit. *DUM DUM DUM! Shrieking noise in the background!* I am the last person on earth who wants to wear one, let alone go shopping for one. I still have another 30 pounds to shed before I even want to see myself in a bathing suit. SIGH...but I must do it for Matthew. Knowing how much M. loves swimming is the only thing that could get me into a bathing suit. Not even Huey could do this. So, sorry to all the people here in Grey Oaks community, make sure you wear your shades and please just look the other way. Just keep your eyes neck up is all I ask.

the cell phone

Matthew LOVES the cell phone. Show him the cell phone from the other end of the room, and he'll start pumping his legs and crawling to get it. He's getting better at crawling!!! :D :D